Heartbreak? Not able to cope with IT | This is the blog you NEED | Breakup Motivation

Hello guys,

Today we are gonna be talking about breakups, heartbreaks, and relationship advices. A lot of people, especially in India which has a love-fueled culture, give a lot of themselves to the relationships. Therefore, when they break up it can absolutely bring down their whole world crumbling. Now, I am no one to give you guys advice about this but once again, I am one of the most positive people now you will meet and if I can help you in any way, then please read this blog if your heart is being broken.

Seven easy steps to overcome any kind of heartbreak and move towards the best ways of your life.

So, the first two steps are mental aspects

Step1: Experiences

Instead of perceiving life as a mixture of good and the bad, start perceiving life as a mixture of good and the teachers. There are only two kinds of experiences, positive experiences and learning. There is no negative experience in the world. Any negative experience you're having will be one of your best teachers. Any bad incident, any bad person, or any bad relationship that you encounter in your life is just a teacher. Right now, it might seem super dark and you might feel like you have been given a box of darkness by someone but that box of darkness will become huge learning eventually. You will figure this out 5 years or 6 years later, maybe. And what you will realize is that in that future relationship when everything is going well for you then you will understand why this particular relationship needed to break so that in your future you can be happy. So, don't hold on to this. This isn't a bad experience rather it's just helping you. The purpose of that in your life is to teach you a lesson and to make you a better version of yourself. Look at everything in that way and instead of sulking in your sadness, try picking up the mistakes you made, try picking up what you can gain from that experience.

Step2: Happiness

Try understanding the golden formula of life. Sadness happens to those people who live in the past. Anxiety or nervousness happens to those people who live in the future and happiness happens to those people who live in the present. Okay, so you have got your heartbroken and all those pieces of your heart are on the floor. Now, are you gonna look on those pieces, and cry yourself to sleep or are you gonna look on those pieces, pick them up, and ask yourself an important question 

Why do we fall? 

So that we can learn to pick ourselves back up. Easier said than done. 

What are the steps involved in curing your heartbreak

Step3: Cut-off

So, the first thing you need to understand, when it comes to breakups is that you never hold on to anything. You let go of things. Holding on to breakups and holding grudges inside you, holding that negativity inside is like holding a hot coal. You think you wanna hold on to it but it's actually damaging your hand, it's damaging your insides, and it's keeping you from becoming the best version of yourself. Remember, the life goal isn't to find your partner, it's all about finding yourself and to eventually become the best version of you. Something that works like absolute magic is to completely cut off from that person, whether it means blocking them on Facebook, Whatsapp, Instagram, or whatever you can think of. Just cut them off. Out of sight is out of mind. If a particular person or an incident is causing you pain, then the decision is in your hand. You wanna keep looking at the photos of that person or the number of that person and keep feeling bad or do you want to do something about your pain and feelings. Get rid of that person from your eyes. Get rid of that person from your heart.

That's the first step towards mending your broken heart. Cutting off from that person and cutting off from that source of pain. But what about the pain that's already captured inside your heart. All that negative energy. I have one answer for that

Step4: Focus 

Don't focus on the word negative but focus on the word energy. I know because of a breakup you have got a lot of emotions and negativity inside you which has made you completely charged up. You are probably feeling a lot of pain at this moment, you are feeling a lot of negativity inside yourself but you also got to remember that at this point in your life, your fuel tank is completely full. You are completely fueled up. You are hurt and you are at a stage of your life where you are like a volcano that's about to erupt. There are two ways in order to deal with it. One is that you sulk, cry, and release it through your tears and sadness but the other way, once again because your job is to become the best version of you, is to channel that energy into something productive. So, for me, as you guys know I took up fitness. I suffered through the same phase in my early twenties when I was a kid. I learned from it and I used fitness as a tool to grow and develop and actually have made significant growth from it. The breakup wasn't the only reason I started working out, there were other reasons as well. But anyway, my point is that it helped me because I channeled all that energy and that is your job. So, instead of letting that negative energy take over you, why don't you try taking over that negative energy. You've been given all this fuel, all this petrol in your petrol tank. Use it for something constructive. One of the best decisions you can make in your life at this point is taking that energy and focussing on becoming the better version of yourself. When you are channeling all that energy the way I channeled it in the gym and you actually see the fruits of your efforts 3-4 months later, that's when you realize that "ok the breakup was one of the best things happened to me in my life". You've got all that fire captured inside yourself right now in your life. Instead of using that fire to burn yourself, try using that fire to create some kind of explosion in the world. That's your goal. 

Step5: Rebound

The fifth point is that many people start to look out for love after their breakup. They want to refill the void inside them. That's not how you look at it. You remember, in the movie Dil Chahta hai there's that dialogue about holding on to the sand. The tighter you hold on to it, the quicker it drops out. It's just like that. You shouldn't just go out looking for love. Love will not come to you that way. It will come when it has to and the time is right. You have to believe that. So, don't go out looking for things putting loads and burden on yourself. 

Step6: Reciprocation

The sixth thing and this is the most important is that when love does come to you, because of your negative experiences in the past you shouldn't hold back yourself in reciprocating and giving back your love. Remember, when you are giving something like love which is a pure emotion you shouldn't hold back. Don't expect anything in return but when you are loving and when you are giving, give it with your whole heart. Don't let one negative experience determine who you become for the rest of your life. That's one of the most important things as a human being. There's only positive experiences and learning and that learning is helping you develop and to become the best version of you. Once you are that best version of you, then you will feel like giving back that best version to the person you love. 

Step7: Perspective

The seventh and final point is what I call perspective. At this point in time, you have got your heartbroken. You are very likely you are young and vulnerable. You believe that the person who broke your heart is probably your dream partner and your dream partner has let you down is what your perspective is all about. You believe with your whole heart on to that one person and they let you go and that's what hurt you. You've got to remember that yes, this negative experience might help you become a more positive version of yourself. It's gonna teach you a lot of things but whats its also going to do is that it's going to create contrasts in your head. Every single human being is in search of their dream partner. He's out there, she's out there and all these are the people you meet along the way towards finding that dream partner, and all are meant to be there so that you can learn to contrast your dream partner against something. All these people are just teachers. Yes, they might have broken your heart and right now you are not able to believe that they are just teachers and not your dream partner. Trust me, if that person let go of you and didn't treat you the way you are meant to be treated then they probably are not meant to be in your life. They probably don't deserve the amount of importance you are giving them. In life, there are only two ways it can go. Either you win, it's all the good, all the happiness or the other side, it's not the losses or the negativities but it's about the teachers and the learnings. Learn from the negative experiences and move towards that positive future.

Either way guys, I hope you like my blog on relationships advices. This was something new I tried after so long. The whole set of advices I have put here is all due to my own experiences and the lessons I learned during my teenage. The people who have supported me during this phase and the ones who have shared their knowledge and resources with me, I have become a better individual.

If you have any questions/queries make sure to drop it in the comments below. I will try to address them in my oncoming blogs.

The next series of blogs are gonna be something different and interesting. There's a lot of motivation stuffs already around. Something interesting is gonna be coming up next. So, stay tuned for that.

Thanks!

All the best!

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